I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
