can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
party gras won. party gras always wins.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
