Pappa wants mamma naked
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize