New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
