Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
