Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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