Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
