U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
