Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize