can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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