he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
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He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize