Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Fuck me I smell like cheese
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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