Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
