are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
