Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
