so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
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The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
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I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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