he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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