Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
