Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
