my sisters under your porch take her home
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
