Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.

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  (914): Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase. http://tfl.nu/ryxu
  Replies (68) Good night (544) Bad night (4361)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.

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  (561): My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist. http://tfl.nu/h6i5
  Replies (39) Good night (5334) Bad night (590)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real

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  (215): these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real http://tfl.nu/vc07
  Replies (62) Good night (7861) Bad night (1213)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them

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  (419): this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them http://tfl.nu/j2wl
  Replies (22) Good night (1255) Bad night (3002)
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  (315): View more from New York

  I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.

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  (315): I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions. http://tfl.nu/ogn1
  Replies (3) Good night (2641) Bad night (921)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.

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  (206): I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day. http://tfl.nu/kwoe
  Replies (32) Good night (2279) Bad night (1015)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.

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  (360): Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours. http://tfl.nu/m716
  Replies (4) Good night (469) Bad night (1369)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.

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  (469): I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part. http://tfl.nu/bfoq
  Replies (8) Good night (714) Bad night (2702)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".

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  (973): i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on". http://tfl.nu/pnhv
  Replies (7) Good night (1403) Bad night (665)
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  (806): View more from Texas

  There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.

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  (806): There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night. http://tfl.nu/26q0
  Replies (4) Good night (416) Bad night (886)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.

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  (304): I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay. http://tfl.nu/a09s
  Replies (6) Good night (732) Bad night (392)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.

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  (615): How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long. http://tfl.nu/h6mm
  Replies (16) Good night (1138) Bad night (378)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much

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  (610): I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much http://tfl.nu/u53w
  Replies (2) Good night (292) Bad night (271)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yes. It does.

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  (309): It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with (847): Yes. It does. http://tfl.nu/cna3
  Replies (4) Good night (786) Bad night (243)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen

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  (306): well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen http://tfl.nu/nqpt
  Replies (1) Good night (213) Bad night (346)

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