honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
