I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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