Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
How external is "for external use only"?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
