Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Randomize
