If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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