So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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