i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize