i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Randomize
