ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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