And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
