I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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