I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Blood and glitter go together right?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize