awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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