is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.