Texts From Last Night

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  (616): View more from Michigan

  hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job

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  (616): hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job http://tfl.nu/32u0
  Replies (16) Good night (1257) Bad night (3133)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.

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  (612): You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast. http://tfl.nu/3zo3
  Replies (47) Good night (29515) Bad night (1492)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  dibs on John Mayer's hood pass

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  (267): dibs on John Mayer's hood pass http://tfl.nu/rqbz
  Replies (35) Good night (2750) Bad night (961)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?

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  (231): So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was? http://tfl.nu/e02a
  Replies (21) Good night (1597) Bad night (4792)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.

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  (631): She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom. http://tfl.nu/uq6s
  Replies (22) Good night (6771) Bad night (1305)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.

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  (631): Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate. http://tfl.nu/qonz
  Replies (5) Good night (1312) Bad night (2814)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight

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  (785): one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight http://tfl.nu/06gq
  Replies (12) Good night (2527) Bad night (1227)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  My mouth holds just enough water for my bong

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  (410): My mouth holds just enough water for my bong http://tfl.nu/u9dn
  Replies (7) Good night (2186) Bad night (1092)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?

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  (626): Did they have a limo or was i just stoned? http://tfl.nu/ui6f
  Replies (4) Good night (2158) Bad night (1088)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.

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  (316): I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent. http://tfl.nu/pby1
  Replies (6) Good night (1322) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.

  (1-413): View more from Massachusetts

  A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.

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  (413): Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens. (1-413): A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck. http://tfl.nu/qib0
  Replies (9) Good night (1514) Bad night (686)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.

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  (616): you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience. http://tfl.nu/y98f
  Replies (1) Good night (899) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.

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  (740): Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets. http://tfl.nu/bpg6
  Replies (0) Good night (347) Bad night (488)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Why do you hate her?

  (1-601): View more from Mississippi

  She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....

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  (601): Why do you hate her? (1-601): She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina..... http://tfl.nu/0u28
  Replies (1) Good night (869) Bad night (384)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out

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  (605): Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out http://tfl.nu/kg6k
  Replies (2) Good night (261) Bad night (31)

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