Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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