My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
