I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
