listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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