can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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