WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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