Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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