Do vagina's smell?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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