Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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