i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
