I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
