I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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