yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize