Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
