i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
